Yog Sothoth

Yog Sothoth by PJ Church

 Yog Sothoth, one of the entities  from the Lovecraft Cthulhu Mythos, one of the great "Old Ones."  Here's a lovely quote from the short Story The Dunwich Horror:

"Yog-Sothoth knows the gate. Yog-Sothoth is the gate. Yog-Sothoth is the key and guardian of the gate. Past, present, future, all are one in Yog-Sothoth. He knows where the Old Ones broke through of old, and where They shall break through again. He knows where They have trod earth’s fields, and where They still tread them, and why no one can behold Them as They tread."

Decades ago, back when I still had time to read fiction, I first encountered the mention of Yog Sothoth in Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shay's epic Illuminatus! trilogy.  This book is a surreal blend of fact and fiction.  In the novel, Yog Sothoth is the creature imprisoned in the Pentagon in Washinton DC.  I'd never thought about the occult significance of the Pentagon's shape and design before, and one of the scenes in the book references an actual occurrence in 1967, in which anti-Vietnam War activists, including Abbie Hoffman and Jerry Rubin circled the Pentagon and performed an exorcism on the Pentagon in an attempt to end the war.  Or to freak out the norms (muggles). 

Needle-felted Merino Wool

It was back in the 1980's when I encountered Illuminatus! and it was an influential book in shaping my worldview, mystical sensibilities, and sense of humor.  The book weaves together practically every major conspiracy from the pre-history of Atlantean civilization to the murder of JFK, written in a style influenced by William Burroughs, Orson Welles, and James Joyce. I've heard some literary folk describe it as a more challenging read than Ullysses. 

Long before the Pastafarians and the Flying Spaghetti Monster, there were a couple satirical, yet functionally useful, religions that I bumped into.  The Church of the Sub-genius, in which I become ordained, and Discordianism, in which I'm a pope. It's not hard.  If you wish to be a Discordian pope, you simply declare yourself so.  This speaks to something about the nature of religious bullshit: personal empowerment vs. mental slavery.  Contributing to Operation Mindfuck became a significant high school hobby for me. 

If you haven't explored the concepts of Discordianism and the goddess Eris, it's a fascinating story, full of synchronicity and weirdness, especially the fact that it's founding text, the Principia Discordia was first printed in 1963 on New Orlean's DA Jim Garrison's Xerox machine.  (Yes, THAT Jim Garrison, the guy who first investigated the "conspiracy" to kill JFK.) 

Created 5-23-17 thru 6-6-17

In the Illuminatus! trilogy, Shea and Wilson worked the Discordians in as a ragtag band of counter-culture rebels fighting against the Illuminati, a shadowy conspiracy founded by a Bavarian monk and Freemason Adam Weishaupt in 1776.  Who or what the Illuminati actually is or isn't, and even whether "they" are the "good guys" or the "bad guys" is an ever shifting target in the book, the point of which, in my opinion, is to subvert all paradigms and to facilitate in the reader stone-cold paranoia, or a freedom from that paranoia into a place of agnosticism and skepticism, a place from which you can begin to see that nothing is true, and that everything is a construct.  At the time, encountering a lot of folks who read this book, I noticed people came out the other side of this book sounding like nut-job conspiracy monger Alex Jones, or they came out fairly liberated from the sea of bullshit in which we swim.  If they were able to actually read it at all. 

Consider this excerpt from Illuminatus!, which is itself an excerpt from the Principia Discordia:

“Hang on for some metaphysics. The Aneristic Principle is that of order, the Eristic Principle is that of disorder. On the surface, the Universe seems (to the ignorant) to be ordered; this is the aneristic illusion. Actually, what order is “there” is imposed on primal chaos in the same sense that a person’s name is draped over his actual self. It is the job of the scientist, for example, to implement this principle in a practical manner and some are quite brilliant at it. But on closer examination, order dissolves into disorder, which is the ERISTIC ILLUSION. "

It didn't take long for this to lead to an encounter with Chaos Magic, a paradigm of DIY esotericism which first seemed to peak in the 80's, and which over the last couple years has experienced a huge resurgence in popularity for some reason.   Along with Discordianism, it's a whole other topic you might wish to peruse if any of this has been of interest to you.  Of the many precepts of Chaos Magic, one that often strikes a chord with people is the notion that you can just as easily work with fictional entities as the supposedly non-fictional ones.  Of course, if you actually explore, you will find that it is just as easy and effective to work with Shiva, Jesus, Odin and Zeus as it is with Cthulhu, Batman, the Easter Bunny and Sherlock Holmes.  Archetypes and constructs activated in the ritual space.

This particular soft, cuddly, merino-wool sculpture of Yog Sothoth was inspired by physicist and chaos author Peter J. Carroll's book "The Portal's of Chaos."  It's a wonderful collection of archetypes, drawing on everything from the Egyptian Pantheon to the classical planet archetypes of Venus and Mercury.  And of course, the "fictional" entities described by pulp novelist H.P. Lovecraft.

   

Excerpt from Portals of Chaos, by Peter J Carroll

THE KEY AND THE GUARDIAN OF THE GATE.  THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE GATES.

PAST, PRESENT, FUTURE ALL ARE ONE IN YOG SOTHOTH.

THE SPAWN OF THE BLANKNESS OF PRIMAL TIME AND SPACE

THE NETHERMOST OUTPOSTS OF TIME AND SPACE,

THE LURKER AT THE THRESHOLD OF OUTER SPACE

THE BREAKER APART OF THE IRIDESCENT GLOBES,

THE CONGERIES OF GLOWING SPHERES CONTERMINOUS WITH TIME AND SPACE

THE KEY TO THE OUTSIDE OF THE UNIVERSE WE INHABIT.

THE KNOWLEDGE OF WHERE THE OLD ONES BROKE THROUGH OF OLD

AND WHERE THEY SHALL BREAK THROUGH AGAIN.

THE MASTERY OF SPACE-TIME GEOMETRY OF THE UNIVERSE.

THE OMNISCIENCE ACROSS SPACETIME

The Saddest Tear

Wow, I haven't updated this blog since January!  It's actually been a pretty productive year, creatively, an expanding roster of yoga and meditation classes and several larger felting projects completed or in process. 

It's interesting that before I discovered the magic of wool and soft sculpture I didn't believe I had any talent as a visual artist at all.  However, part of my process with the wool pieces has occasionally included rudimentary sketches of ideas, and lately, as I've continued working more with wet felting and mixed media sculptures, I've started using watercolors to create drafts of things I plan to felt, and in so doing, have actually fallen in love with watercolors, the process of working with them, the way the colors flow across the paper.  AND, for any of you who work with needle felting, you will understand when I say I LOVE that I can complete something beautiful in just a few minutes with watercolor, whereas even something cute and simple, like the Teardrop featured in this post, can take me several hours.  And the more elaborate pieces can take up to a month or more worth of free time.

In thinking about which new piece to share here first, I went with the teardrop because it speaks to something I've been experiencing this year.  While here and there in my life, as all people do, I've had brief periods where I felt down, these down-moods only ever lasted a few days, and certainly weren't something I considered "depression." 

And since this blog is a place where I overshare my personal emotional processes along with my work, I have to say, that what I'm experiencing doesn't feel like depression either.  Even though I'm not catholic, I recognize the emotional darkness I find myself in is essentially what St. John of the Cross describes as "The Dark Night of the Soul."  It is a place of despair, and a sense of everything in life being drained of meaning.  And it has gone on for months so far.

I am not going to lie.  Art doesn't really help that much, and feels as meaningless as everything else right now, but it has still provided a place to explore the experience, to be present with the emotion and learn what it has to teach..  It's my understanding that this "Dark Night" is part of a spiritual growth process, and I attempt to feel gratitude for "Pain as Teacher" but there are times, just like the characters in The Matrix, where I think "Why, oh why didn't I take the Blue Pill?"  I.E., why did I embark on this pursuit of authenticity rather than remain in my comfortable, slightly numb, superficial but relatively pleasant life?  I only hope that when or if I come through the other side of this it will be worth it.  Apparently, Mother Teresa, in all of her years in spiritual service to the world, remained in the "dark night" for over 50 years.  Ouch!

If by chance you are interested in the idea that what you feel as depression might actually be a process of deeper personal transformation and growth, I found the following article really helpful: 
"A Dark Night of the Soul and the Discovery of Meaning."

Sushumna

Most recent mixed media tapestry, initiated December 25, 2015. . .and finally got the snake vertebrae sewed on yesterday.   Merino wool, glass bead, snake vertebrae.

'bOrt

'bOrt the unloved.  'bOrt the unwanted.  'bOrt the embryonic clown.  Would have been the son of Scooch.  'bOrt preserved for the sake of science, in a jar.  Dead tissue speaks in a scaly whisper, a mandala of meat under the microscope: does evil begin in the womb?  "Out damn'd spot." cries Lady Macbeth.  And Macduff, "I from my mother's womb wast untimely ripped!"  The modern mantras of affluent power. 

All matter has consciousness, all matter vibrates. Preserved for eternity, 'bOrt is the  knower and keeper of secrets.  Look at his eyes.  No mere dead clump of hair to be blithely flushed down the toilet, he is animated with the mirthful knowledge of everything you want to hide from the world. 

They generally always deviate from the sketch.

Excerpt from the 'bOrt video w/Merzbow soundtrack.

Freshly squeezed 'bOrt.

Profile

Fashion forward spine-revealing back-straps on jacket.

Soaked and sealed, arms open for the hug that will never come. 

Scooch

Scooch:  If you don't shit your pants, he'll shit them for you.

In an ongoing theme, I can only say this year hasn't been about procrastinating the felting projects, it's just been a year filled with travel, and teaching and studying yoga.  It's taken nearly all my time.  And it's been SO VERY GOOD.

In the meantime, before I resume where I left off with the Rust, Wood, and Wool projects, I first have to get a couple crazy clowns out of my system. 

Meet Scooch.  People that know Scooch best say he's so scary . . . that,  "If you don't shit your pants, he'll shit them for you."

Chakra Yantras: Collaborating With My Amazing Wife

Muladhara, Root Chakra

 I've just gotten back from an epic month studying yoga, culture, and history in Nepal, so the felting project has again been on hiatus.  In the meantime, I'd like to share a project my wife and I collaborated on prior to the Nepal trip.

Svadhisthana, Sacral Chakra

My wife, Annou Davi, over the last few years, has been painting some beautiful pieces of flowing, energetic patterns inspired by nebulas and other astronomical phenomenon, combined with sacred geometry.  And over the last few years, I have worked a lot with the tantric Chakra system as at first a student and then more recently as a yoga teacher and yoga therapist.  And so, it occurred to me to ask Annou to collaborate on a series of paintings for each of the chakra yantras.  (Each chakra has a specific geometric symbol associated with it.)

Manipura, Solar Plexus Chakra

The idea was to spend a week practicing specific types of asana, pranayama, mantra, meditation, visualization, etc, as well as studying the correspondences and psychological implications of each chakra, and then using that as the inspiration for the energetic flows in each piece.

To provide an example of chakra correspondences--without going exhaustively into all seven chakras--Muladhara, the root chakra, is associated with:  The color red, early childhood development, the element earth, the base of the spine, saturn, pentacles in tarot, the elephant, survival and grounding, cedar, and rubies. . .and that's just for starters.  It is also associated with a number of specific health ailments.

Anahata, Heart Chakra

These paintings were designed to be used as object-meditation pieces specifically for focusing the mind and balancing the chakras, and in the time I've spent meditating with each of these paintings, I've found them to be very effective.  And simply an aesthetic pleasure as well. 

Vishuddha, Throat Chakra

My input was teaching and guiding our yoga practices through the process, providing some conceptual framework and editing advice, but the paintings, vision, and hard work are ALL Annou.  I love these pieces, and it was really fun and romantic to work on a spiritual and artistic endeavor together.

Anja, the Third Eye

 These paintings are done on 12"x12" canvas with acrylic, and the yantras (symbols) are gold oil paint for that medium's dynamic, reflective quality. 

Sahasrara, the Crown Chakra

Girlfriend with Drill, very sexy!

Solve et Coagula

Merino wool, rusty barbed wire, pyrography, wood.  17"x24"

Solve et Coagula is the Latin alchemical phrase associated with turning base metals into gold.  "Solve" means solution, or something broken down to its component parts.  "Coagula" or coagulation, is the assembly of those components into a greater whole.  In this piece that idea is being explored through wool, with the individual locks representing Solve, and the felted piece on the right, having undergone transmutation through heat and friction, representing Coagula.

"Coagula"

While the idea of turning lead into gold holds no literal merit, the concept is generally considered a metaphor for the great work of elevating human consciousness from a base to illuminated state. 

From a fiber art/aesthetic perspective, I enjoy the simplicity of the wool itself, and this was a fun way to display a before/after view of the locks as they were, and what they become when felted.

Close up, raw merino locks.  "Solve."

"Don't Touch Me."

 Continuing to explore the intersection and material juxtaposition of  rusty metal, wool, and wood with this piece of wire embedded in fine, white merino. 

It was challenging to felt for a few reasons.  One, wool shrinks, and barbed wire obviously doesn't.  Since it was embedded in the layout, it was a challenge to get the wool to shrink around the wire in a way that still left the shape I was creating. 

Second, the fulling process is generally done by rolling the material in a bamboo mat, and by throwing the piece, neither of which I could do here.  I basically had to get the wool to transform into completed felt by the slow tedious process of massaging the entire piece with my fingertips, being careful not to stab myself with the rusty wire. 

I am really enjoying the process of refining this aesthetic and the use of these materials in both abstract and figurative pieces.  It's very tactile, and the soft wool is inviting to the fingertips,  yet says "Don't touch me" with the dangerous, sharp barbs breaking through the surface.
                                    --PJ Church 2015

Rusty barbed wire, merino wool, wood.  18" x 5"

Rusty barbed wire, merino wool, wood.  18" x 5"

Raw, Unprocessed Wool

I just got some new fleeces to work with.  They look so pretty is this raw, unprocessed ,unwashed state. . .right off the sheep!

Coated Merino Fleece

Merino Close Up

Black Corriedale

Icelandic Ewe

Icelandic  Ewe Closeup

Teeswater Locks

Leicester Fleece

Got Goat? (Part II)

Baphomet Evocation, 17", Tea stained wood, wool, rusty barbed wire, pyrography.

Continuing the exploration of the barnyard aesthetic using wood, wool and barbed wire.  Specifically rusty barbed wire.  Also continuing the theme of "From Sheep, Goats" juxtaposing the image of individuality, freedom, and unity consciousness arising from materials derived from the animal that has traditionally symbolized weakness, obedience, and subservience-of-self to the dictates of the herd.

Barbed wire is used to circle the tops of prisons, and to restrict the free movement of animals upon the earth. 

Rusting, the barbed wire is in a state of decay, as we observe the old stale power structures in the world beginning to weaken, stagnate,and crumble, losing the power to restrict humanity from reaching its full potential. 

In this particular piece the barbed wire is being absorbed into the goat itself, that internal alchemy of transmuting base metal into gold. 

For all the menace that some people seem to associate with this particular classic rendering of the five pointed goat, it's ears are so soft and cuddly, it's nose wanting to nuzzle playfully, a smile hinting at the hidden mirth of Baphomet's roots as Pan, that horny hybrid of animal, man and god. 

One of the seed pieces that preceded this was Baphomet Invocation, started and completed December 25, 2013.  There, the goat is not yet formed in three dimensions, but is instead sigilized through pyrography on a bit of board scavenged from construction trash, with raw locks of wool impaled on rusty barbed wire, and beneath, a representation of those same locks transformed into felt.

Baphomet Invocation

Traditionally, in images of Baphomet's full body, we see the word "Solve" tattooed on he/she's right arm, and "Coagula" on the left.  "Solve" represents the component ingredients, and "Coagula" is the synthesizing of those components into a new coherent substance.  This has long been how I have viewed working with wool, the component locks, chosen, selected, manipulated, and put through the transformational process of "Tapas"  (heat, discomfort) to become "felt."  Or Gold.  Or "True Will."  In Baphomet Invocation we can see Solve in the locks, and Coagula in the felt nailed to the bottom of the board.

I feel it has to be addressed, because unsurprisingly this comes up sometimes:  "What's up, is this stuff satanic?"

No.  It is not.  For fun and curiosity, I'll look at the historic and symbolic components of Baphomet in  a future post, along with modern implications.

As an afterthought, a bit of relevant trivia: according to the Chinese Zodiac, we are about to enter the Year of the Goat.  Additionally, the Chinese Zodiac contains a five element aspect.  This is the year of the "Wooden Goat" which occurs once every sixty years. 



And:  some funny goat noises.

Felting Stones as a First Chakra Meditation

I'm excited and honored to be teaching another SFEtsy sponsored craft event at the Museum of Craft and Design in San Francisco.  Last time we played with needle felting colorful mushrooms.    This time we are going to make a big, soapy mess as we use our hands to wet-felt beach stones. 

This wet-felting project is a quick, simple and easy process that can be learned by anyone.  While I plan to teach this as a straight-forward craft project, I wanted to write a little bit about the original conception of this project as it relates to my yoga therapy practice.

The previous blog post is a more in-depth look at the yogic chakra system, but just to review, one way to look at the chakra system is to realize it is an energetic map of where we store and process emotions in different places in our body.  In that sense, there's nothing especially mystical about it.  We all know we feel love at our heart center (fourth chakra), that our insight is in our head (sixth chakra), that certain emotions make us feel"choked up" (fifth chakra) and that we feel butterflies in our stomach where our center of confidence is (third chakra).  And we speak of feeling "ungrounded" or uprooted when we experience certain types of trauma or stress.

The root/1st chakra (Muladhara) is associated with the color red and the element of earth, of feeling grounded, and with our feeling of "the right to be here."  It's connected to our relationship with money, security, and home.   It's this idea of the "right to be here" that ultimately inspired me to choose this earth-element root chakra project for the event at the Museum of Craft and Design. 

It's not news to anyone living in San Francisco that there's a wide spread sense of insecurity about the "right to be here."    Almost all of us know someone who has been displaced, literally pushed out of their home by soaring rents, or worse, evicted by real estate speculators exploiting the Ellis Act to push long term tenants out, and hiking rents to ridiculous rates ($3200 studio apartments anyone?) to feed the beast of the Silicon Valley gold rush. 

Even if you aren't personally on the verge of getting pushed out of your city and your home, it's difficult for sensitive citizens to not feel the first chakra anxieties that are permeating San Francisco right now.  I would say it's even experienced by the new wave of affluent tech workers who feel the resentment here, or see the protests against the Google buses for example.  There's no security in feeling resented by the city you've moved to just because of the field you are in. 

From the perspective of yoga therapy, there are a number of ways to ease root chakra anxieties and imbalances.  Authentic movement, tribal dance, grounding yoga asanas/poses, specific breathing practices, gardening, or going for a barefoot walk on the beach are all tremendously therapeutic and grounding. 

I have found the art and craft of felting to be healing in many different ways and it has been a natural progression to want to find ways to consciously apply this in my practice of yoga therapy to help others experience this.  Felting beach stones is just one example

The Sanskrit/symbol for Muladhara, the root chakra

In felting beach stones, you will experience the earthy heaviness of the stone in your hand.  You can direct your attention to the soothing calmness of that weight in your hand as you select the stone you want to work with. 

Other elements are present as well.  Feel the light, airy wool between your fingers as you direct those energies of the heart into the work you are creating.  The element of fire, the heat of your confident solar plexus in the "fire" that is used to heat the water we use.  Consciously breathe as you work, feeling that heat in your hands and direct that confidence and heat into the stone and into your root chakra as you work.  And the water itself, that second chakra sense of desire, passion and sexual energy, water, the sensual way we move our body, the blood flowing in our veins. 

Do this work meditatively.  See the colors and the wool, working the wool mindfully around the stone.  Feel the heat of fire in your hands, and the sensual slippery way the water lets the wool transform into soft, protective felt around the heavy stone.  Notice the calm, grounded and centered way this work makes you feel.

And later, keep the stone in a place that is meaningful to you.  And when you are feeling stressed out, ungrounded or anxious, pick it up, feel that weight and that softness, and remind yourself that whatever life hands you, the ground is always beneath your feet, feeding and nourishing you with its energy, and that as a creature of earth, YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO BE HERE.

Blossoming Chakras

Blossoming Chakras, 10"x22"

Work all week and yoga school every weekend leaves very little time for felt creations.  But last friday, had a whole day free to myself,  homework complete, no clients, and so took the opportunity to make this felted tapestry as an homage to the chakra module we just finished up as part of the advanced yoga teacher training.  This tapestry has been gifted to the absolutely wonderful Purusha Yoga School in San Francisco, at 38th and Balboa, where I'm doing my training. 

I tried a technique, new to me, of embedding stones in the wool, each one wrapped in a different chakra color and then overlaid in black roving.  After felting, the stones are cut out and creates the outward exploding three dimensional "petals."  The dimensionality is not that visible from this straight on angle.

A few notes on chakras, if you don't already know.  The chakras are the yogic concept of energy centers located at specific points in the body, and associated with different physical and psychological parts of our selves.  Whether you regard the chakras as real or simply as metaphors is immaterial, as working physically and meditatively with these locations and their associated concepts will yield healing results regardless.  You might also notice the relative similarity of the chakra model to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. 

Starting at the base and working up is the root chakra in red, Muladhara, located at the base of the spine, and is associated with trust vs. mistrust, our sense of "right to be here," survival, grounding, and our relationship with money.  It's your foundation, your roots, and without balance in home and finances and a balanced sense of security, it is truly difficult to have a healthy balance throughout the rest of your physical, mental and spiritual self.  Traumas around these issues manifest as an imbalance in this chakra, and can include behaviors like hoarding, over-eating, as well as physical problems with feet and knees.  Even those who have never been exposed to the concept of chakras intuitively recognize chakra imbalances, and you see it in our language.  For instance, when we refer to someone as a "tight ass" we are talking about someone with root chakra issues.

The second chakra, Svadisthana, orange, located at the navel point is the seat of our sexuality, our sense of desire, autonomy vs. shame, and a source of our creativity.  This chakra is associated with the element of water, and there's nothing like a long barefoot walk on the beach, or a hot scented bath to get this chakra to blossom. 

The third Chakra, Manipura, yellow, located at the abdomen, is the seat of our will, our initiative, our "right to act" in the world.  Someone deficient in this chakra might manifest this physically by hunching at their center, and conversely someone excessive in this chakra might have a more militant posture. We might say of this person, "she is really gutsy!"

The fourth chakra, Anahata, green, is our heart.  Love.  Conversely, grief.  I find it beautiful that the word "anahata" literally means "the unstruck sound."  There are many yoga practices for helping with issues related to this chakra, but chocolate seems to do the trick as well.

Fifth Chakra, Vishuddha, Blue is our throat center, our center of expression.  Deficiency in this chakra can lead to throat problems and difficulty expressing yourself, and conversely, excess might manifest as compulsive lying or abusive, passive-aggressive ways of speaking.  Singing and chanting mantras is a wonderful way to help balance and open this chakra. 

Sixth is Ajna, purple, the third eye, our intellect, our intuition, visionary states, and our ability to "see." Someone strong or excessive in the sixth and seventh chakras, but unbalanced in the first three chakras, is the archtypal "spiritual space cadet" that you will envariably encounter in any spiritual community, be it a Kundalini class or a Baptist church.  Those who refuse to responsibly do for themselves because "god" or "the universe" will take care of everything.  Alternately, deficiencies here and in the seventh can result in the rationalist/skeptic intellectual devoid of any sense of spirituality.  (It is also possible to find a balance between rational skepticism and a sense of spirituality.)

Seventh, Crown Chakra, Sahasrara, white or gold, this chakra is located directly above the body, and has been represented as a halo in early Christian art dating as far back as the fourth century CE.  This chakra is where our sense of connection to others and to the world resides.  It's where we find that sense of "all is one" and realize our divine nature.

This stuff may all seem abstract and theoretical when you read about it, but when you start working with specific meditations, breathing exercises, and physical yoga poses targeted at opening and balancing the chakras, it can be life changing.  If you are interested in chakra work, I highly recommend Anodea Judith's book The Sevenfold Journey: Reclaiming Mind, Body & Spirit Through the Chakras.